Sorry Is The Hardest Word
If there's anything harder than saying sorry, it's saying sorry and actually meaning it. By meaning it, I'm referring to saying sorry and actually changing for the better.
I came to this conclusion recently after following two tv shows this year that illustrate the point well. In Californication David Duchovny portrayed Hank Moody as a brilliant and funny but flawed writer who never seemed to be able to get his act together. Despite the love of a 12 year old daughter and the care of good friends who stood by him through thick and thin, Hank was never able to overcome himself. Particularly heartbreaking was one episode when his daughter could not hide her disappointment at being let down yet again, and told him in no uncertain terms that one day she's not going to care anymore. The episode ended with Hank lamenting that he needed to change, but at the same having no clue at all where to start.
Side note : Californication is quite blasphemous in certain episodes, and the show is generally quite profane and pushes the envelope on just about everything. Be warned.
The other show was House MD Season 3. Time and again House realises the pain he causes to people around him, but like Hank Moody, he seemed incapable of doing anything about it. House thrived on living in denial, self pity and avoiding the truth, and on certain episodes in Season 3 he is forced to face his real self. Particularly memorable was the episode where a rape victim chose to connect with him, and for once, House found his humanity again. Also outstanding were the episodes related to a policeman's attempts to prosecute him for drug abuse - House fell into a spiral of hurting more and more people as he refused to give up his addiction to painkillers.
But like Hank Moody, although House was able to on occasion say sorry, nothing changed.
We may gape with a mixture of fascination and wonder at the antics of these two man-childs, but we probably fail to realize that quite often, we are just like them, too.
Personally, I also feel quite mortified that often, I am no better than Hank or House in atoning for my actions.
2 comments:
Oh...I so know the HOUSE drama you are refering to. That episode on the rape victim was super touching!
But I think saying sorry in itself is an achivement. It is something to be TAUGHT!
And as a Christian, I feel when we say sorry, something in our conscience actually pricks us to really try and change for the better.
Sorry is a journey, more than a word.
When we regret our action, our inner heart would go for sorry but our pride may prevent it from expressing it.
It takes one's courage to express apology but it takes one's life to never repeat it.
So sorry is not the hardest...changing for good and maintaining it is the hardest of all.
For myself, I always take my job very seriously and at times neglected the concern to my family for which my wife always reminded and at times very angry for my action especially when I also worked on my leave days. I have apologise many times for it is wrong for me to put my job on top of my family.
Now, over the past 12 years, I am still juggling very hard to remind myself that my family is more important and do not be overwhelm by my job...although it gives me the income that I need to support my family (change the mindset, I am giving my job the profits)
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